by Johnny Glover
click here for cast list
Episode 44 - "A Review of the facts - Such As They Are - (May 19th 1998 00:10)
'So, Yaxley Farcett' said Fred Ricketts 'Just exactly what do yew want to know ?' The young Drainage Inspector took another long swig on his pint of water and cradled the glass in his hands. 'Well' he replied after a moments thought. 'First, I suppose, would be - Who Killed Reg Dixon ?' He paused again. 'Failing that, my next question would be - Who do you think did it ? You seem to be the eyes and ears of the village'. Ricketts drained his glass of whisky and refilled Fiona Morgan's tumbler and his own. Yaxley was content to stick to water following the embarrassing incident involving his stomach and the carpet. 'Well', said Ricketts, 'I was weighing all this up while I was sitting in the pub. You haven't really got a lot to go on hev yew bor ?' Farcett shook his head. So far the information he had amassed didn't really take him anywhere. He knew that Daisy and Anne Worthington had had a huge row only half an hour before Dixon was murdered and that there was a rumour that Dixon and Anne Worthington had been having an affair. He had also discovered that Reg Dixon had lost his job as Agricultural Correspondent for Ealham on The Net a fortnight previously after being sacked by Graham Trent, the apparently loathed Editor. Throw into that weak factual casserole the impending Manure Burning Power Station controversy which Fiona's Dad, Cedric, seemed to be centre of, and that was it. No clues as such, just a lot of hearsay. Most of it from Fred himself, as well. And, lest it be forgotten, the small matter of twenty five rampant pigs which had decided to chase an accountant through the village before falling asleep beside the railway line. That, however, thought Yaxley, is a matter for the morning. The pigs can wait.
'No' replied Farcett after running the facts through his mind. 'I've got bugger all to go on'. He was starting to feel more healthy now and he was able to open his left eye without the room going into a freefall akin to The Big One on Blackpool Pleasure Beach. He looked around the caravan and was surprised at just how neat and tidy it was. He had expected it to be filthy and full of fish and poultry and old newspapers but to his surprise it was a very cosy little home. There were cushions and a few plants and all the things that people would normally describe as 'the woman's touch', but Ricketts lived alone, with only Bella his dog for company. The book shelves were crammed with a variety of material and it was obvious that Ricketts was not a man to pigeon hole. In fact, as the man had told him earlier on, when Farcett had made an assumption about Reg Dixon- Don't judge a book by the cover.
The whisky was beginning to have a soporific effect on Fiona Morgan. She was relaxing in her armchair listening to the other two chat and enjoying the ambience of Ricketts home; the dimly lit gas lights set in the walls, the sound of the wind blowing outside, the radio playing quietly in the background and mostly the whisky working it's way through her mind. She looked across at Ricketts and smiled. 'Tell Yaxley about Barnham, Fred. You bring it to life. Tell Yaxley some of your stories'.
The prologue - Episode One - Episode 2 - Episode 3 - Episode 4 - Episode 5 - Episode 6 - Episode 7 - Episode 8 - Episode 9 - Episode 10 - Episode 11- Episode 12 - Episode 13 - Episode 14 - Episode 15 - Episode 16 - Episode 17 - Episode 18 - Episode 19 - Episode 20 - Episode 21 - Episode 22 - Episode 23 - Episode 24 - Episode 25 - Episode 26 - Episode 27 - Episode 28 - Episode 29 - Episode 30 - Episode 31 - Episode 32 - Episode 33 - Episode 34 - Episode 35 - Episode 36 - Episode 37 - Episode 38 - Episode 39 - Episode 40 - Episode 41 - Episode 42 - Episode 43 - Episode 45 - Cast List - 'Did you see the wrist watch in Ben Hur' ?- The Colly Continuity Page.
Comments to firstname.lastname@example.org
Hugh, exiled fenman from King's Lynn says "Hev you ever thought about running a bus trip to see where "collie" is made like they do for Last Of the Summer Wine, Emmerdale, Corrie and the like. Could be a laugh!!!!!"
Who Dunnit? Your suggestions Please.
Mike Northfield says "Oi reckons that there was one of those there freaky weather thingies that frew that there pitch fork 'ard enough t' stab 'im and cause serious illness such as death thats wot i fink......." - So Mike reckons the freak fen blow caused poor Reg's death.
DG says "I did you this time!!!!!!! Shame I hadn't pushed you harder in 1966!!!!!! Shame Nursy Broadhead saved you?????????????????" - after he sent this message they locked him up again!
MG says "I reckon it were suicide. You see, Reg was quite obviously a bit iron hoof or POOF as we call 'em, and in them there days, well it wer'nt propper wus it?
James Brown says "I suspect a fallen pitchfork from one of the overhead helicopters ferrying a local farmer to the office of KLFM for one of their match reports on a Lynn home game."
World Leader reckons "I think that Monica woman did it. Damn girl never could keep her mouth shut. And she was always letting things drop". Yours World Leader