by Reg Dixon
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Episode 24 - Back to "Like Chips In The Night" (May 18th 1998 5.15pm)
Yaxley Farcett and Brian (Bunter) Worthington were bouncing along at a reasonably high speed in Farcett's Ford Escort towards the roadside diner that Farcett had been to that morning. It was there that he had received the call on his mobile, telling him to go to Cauliflower Drove. They passed by the outskirts of Ealham and continued for another ten miles until they reached the Fried Food Haven. Since Yaxley's all day breakfast at nine o'clock that morning he had only had biscuits with Brian while watching 'Columbo' and Daisy Worthington's 'Hairy Cake From Hell'. The Diner liked to pride themselves on their fast service. Underneath the purple neon sign for 'Like Chips In The Night' it said in brackets 'Greased Lightning'.
They pulled into a parking space and Yaxley waited for Candi Statton to stop singing 'Young Hearts run free'. He had heard that song one summer while on holiday and it had been his 'Summer Record' that year. It had stuck with him ever since. It was one of those songs he didn't like to stop. In fact sometimes if he arrived at a place and if the song was just starting, he would have to sit in his car for the next three minutes twenty four seconds until it finished before he could get out of the car. As the last note faded he quickly switched off the tape, for if another of his 'unswitchoffables' came on, he could have been there another five minutes. Yaxley had about twenty such songs; 'Farcett's Greatest hits'. However, the twenty songs were fairly fluid depending on what mood he was in. His latest compilation tape (featuring Candi Statton) he had called 'More Gasboard'. Brian was staring at the cassette box as the car fell silent. He turned to face Yaxley and asked curiously, 'Wos this mean ? More Gasboard ?' Yaxley was slightly embarrassed. He hadn't intended for anyone to see his home made tapes, it was just that he was so bloody fed up with writing 'Various' in felt tip on every tape he ever did. 'It's a bit of a play on words' he replied, 'Y'know- More Gasboard- Smorgasbord....The Swedish Buffet. All my tasty morsals on one tape. I'm going to do another one called 'Some More Gasboard'. Brian looked at him from the corner of one eye. 'And what's wrong with calling your tapes 'various' ? I do. I can normally get about five songs each from Eric, Tina, Chris De Burgh, Celine and Elton on my tapes' he said in a petulant tone. Yaxley began to open the car door and said something rather derogatory about Brian's musical taste which, fortunately, Brian could not hear. However, sensing the tone of the comment, he shut his door and walked a couple of paces behind Farcett towards the Diner. 'Are they all like you in Bradford ?' he shouted...........
The prologue - Episode One - Episode 2 - Episode 3 - Episode 4 - Episode 5 - Episode 6 - Episode 7 - Episode 8 - Episode 9 - Episode 10 - Episode 11- Episode 12 - Episode 13 - Episode 14 - Episode 15 - Episode 16 - Episode 17 - Episode 18 - Episode 19 - Episode 20 - Episode 21 - Episode 22 - Episode 23 - Episode 25 - Cast List - 'Did you see the wrist watch in Ben Hur' ?- The Colly Continuity Page.
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Who Dunnit? Your suggestions Please.
DG says "I did you this time!!!!!!! Shame I hadn't pushed you harder in 1966!!!!!! Shame Nursy Broadhead saved you?????????????????" - after he sent this message they locked him up again!
MG says "I reckon it were suicide. You see, Reg was quite obviously a bit iron hoof or POOF as we call 'em, and in them there days, well it wer'nt propper wus it?
James Brown says "I suspect a fallen pitchfork from one of the overhead helicopters ferrying a local farmer to the office of KLFM for one of their match reports on a Lynn home game."
World Leader reckons "I think that Monica woman did it. Damn girl never could keep her mouth shut. And she was always letting things drop". Yours World Leader